Three kings is too much to expect in a modern slimmed-down monarchy
‘Three kings is too much to expect in a modern slimmed-down monarchy.’
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Monday
I’ve been good this year if you don’t count a little rioting and looting
‘I’ve been good this year if you don’t count a little rioting and looting.’
You’re terribly white
‘You’re terribly white.’
May I remind the audience
‘May I remind the audience to turn mobile phones on.’
I’m not convinced this is going to work
‘I’m not convinced this is going to work.’
You need to download the app!
‘Wake up! You need to download the app!’
Check out the podcast
‘Check out the podcast.’
Electric vehicles backlash
Poles apart
‘It’s like we’re poles apart.’
Perfect christmas present
‘I thought a robin would be the perfect Christmas present, but they didn’t seem to like it.’
Invitation
‘It’s an invitation to spend Christmas with the relatives.’
Your presents are out for delivery
Mistletoe
I think we’re being watched
‘I think we’re being watched.’
Gifts
Become the story
‘We’ve become the story.’
A middle-aged man’s guide to ageing gracefully
Middle-aged men might be feeling persecuted at the moment. But we bring so much of the opprobrium upon ourselves. The MasterChef host Gregg Wallace has, it should be remembered, not been charged with any crime. But the allegations of his inappropriate, predatory and downright cringe-worthy behaviour towards women have inspired the kind of reaction among my male colleagues and friends that I haven’t heard the likes of since the arrival of David Brent and The Office some 20-plus years ago. Nobody finds your Tommy Cooper impression funny because the only other person old enough to remember Tommy Cooper is outside hectoring a stranger about the smoking ban ‘You don’t understand,
